Change of Weather?

So these past couple of days I have been in a weird mood. I don't know what it is really, or why I am feeling this way. But the only thing I can possibly think of is I feel like if I am missing something in my life. I don't want to sound all emo or what not, but I have only lost one thing recently, so could that be it? I didn't think it would make this much of an impact on me, but I think it really is. Hmm, I don't know maybe I am just thinking crazy. Who knows? But I miss alot of things that have to do with this one thing that has kinda sorta forgotten about me. I know you are confused, But I know what I am rambling about, and that is all that really matters I suppose.

I think my life is at a breaking point right now. I don't know, just another crazy thought. But let's see, I have a half-ass part time job, not going to school, and not a committed relationship with someone. Not so good? All I have is a fantastic family, and a great set of friends, I guess that's all I really need. :) I don't know what I want to do with my life. I sit and try to think about what is going to be the perfect career for me, but I feel as if Ohio doesn't have much to offer. Maybe I am crazy and just indecisive. who knows? But the only real thing that I can think of that I would be absolutely satisfied doing is being a mother and wife and staying at home cooking pies and making my family happy. But it's hard for women to do that these days because you need a hard working job to just survive. I want to do something with my creative side, but what? an art teacher was on my list. but will i be happy? Don't know. I thought the makeup thing was what I wanted to do. I was soo set on it, Had a great job working with Christian Dior, and I just bombed it. It hit me that I didn't want to do it anymore. So.. I don't know. I am 19, and still indecisive on life.. Is that bad? Oh Well, my parents are here to support me with whatever I decide to do.

So yeah, that's whats on my mind right now. I guess I will just have to see if this feeling moves on. but I don't know.